It’s kind of funny, this is somethig that is definitely a factor in the dancing world but is usually not talked about. There are so many times that I have witnessed tension between couples because of the “dancing with another person” scenario. The tension does exist, yet most of us just stay out of it and do wish the couple the best outcome. But I think most of us secretly ask ourselves what we would be okay with given those circumstances.
Is it okay if your significant other dances Salsa with other people? Salsa is a high energy dance that does not really involve very intimate moves like some other dances. But, at the same time, it does involve being in physical contact with another person, and has the ultimate goal of enabling the person you are dancing with to show off a display of sexuality, whether it be masculine or feminine. Yet, the dance can be executed without any intentions of sexual contact or desire. So the answer to this question is very relative to each individual couple and there own unique circumstances.
Is Salsa Intimate?
I would have to say that salsa can be very intimate, but so can just about every other dance out there. Some dances are most definitely more intimate and can involve way more physical contact .
Salsa does involve physical contact and if it is not you that your significant other is touching, then it is very likely to stir up some emotions inside of you. These emotions will probably not feel that good.
Salsa is a fast paced Latin dance and consists of many patterns that involves many turns and a display of physical balance rather than a display of sexual intimacy.
Salsa is definitely much less of a display of sexual intimacy when compared to other Latin dances like Bachata, Rumba, or Bolero.
However, Salsa still involves the holding and touching of the other person and a connection to the music.
When the two people are in tune with each other to create a display of connection, whether sexual or not, this can feel threatening to the significant other standing on the side of the dance floor.
So in a sense, salsa can be very intimate, because it requires a connection with the other person and to the music to execute the amazing patterns.
Salsa is a display of patterns that will get others attention and they will conclude that the “couple” on the dance floor looks great.
I think when others watching can draw a conclusion like that, then I would say that salsa is an intimate dance.
A Dance, Can Be Just That, A Dance
At the end of the day, dancing with someone does not automatically mean there is sexual attraction. Actually, it is quite the contrary. Being a dance instructor, I have danced with hundreds of women, and 99.9999999% of the time there is no sexual attraction.
People are very capable of dancing with other people just for the sake of dancing, and I would say this is the case for the majority of salsa dancers. For salsa dancers it is like a sport. It is a sport they love to do and the chances of taking that a way from them is minimal to none.
Dancing is a great past time and once you get involved in it, it becomes very addicting. Salsa dancing usually involves a community of dancers and all of those dancers typically take turns dancing with each other.
Most of the dancers in the community have no intentions whatsoever in hooking up with the people that they are dancing with. On the the other hand, It can be quite common for some dancers to end up dating each other.
Salsa can be danced very much in a platonic way, but at the same time, it is also a great way to meet other people and providing potential for meeting a special someone.
A Dance Can Be A Great Icebreaker
So lets face the facts. Its true that salsa dancing can be just innocent fun, but it does have that potential for taking things further.
Its like marijuana is a gateway drug to harder drugs, dancing Salsa is like the gateway to possible dating!
When you are a salsa dancer it is very easy to walk up to someone you are attracted to and just ask them to dance without the person knowing you have further intentions or desires.
Whereas any other venue, like a non-salsa club, if you ask someone to dance, they usually automatically think that you are attracted to them and that automatically puts there guard up.
So yes, salsa dance can be extremely innocent but if your significant other wanted to stray from you, salsa makes that much easier and in a sense, alright to do so (dance with someone other than you) in the context of a relationship.
My Man Dances With Me Only!
For me, this is a tough one being that I am a dance instructor. However, I totally understand this mentality and respect it.
Before I was a dancer, it was my belief that my significant other would only dance with me. This is how I grew up and was ultimately taught by society.
Its hard to accept that your significant other dancing with other people should be okay. And the fact is, maybe its not okay in the context of your relationship. If you are both dancers and are heavily involved in a salsa community then chances are you can make that work.
I think for some people, that may not work. I think if your relationship allows for the dancing with other people, chances are you are involved with a community that you know very well.
But when new people show up on the scene and want to dance with your significant other , I think that is when things get a little different. Lets face it, when that new attractive face in the community shows up and wants to dance with your significant other, it can become tough to maintain that whole, “oh, Im okay with it!” thing.
But, if its the same people you are used to, than sure, its no problem. I think we all have our limits in the security we are capable of feeling in our relationships and the amount of freedom we are willing to extend to our partner.
After all, is there not suppose to be a bit of sacrifice when it comes to our freedom when in a relationship. Or, do we just carry on in the same manner like when we were single?
I think give and take is a normal thing in a relationship and will ultimately determine the success of it. Maybe dancing with other people is something that you may need to sacrifice for your relationship.
If its for someone you truly love than the sacrifice may be well worth it. Only you know the answer to that.
Worth The Risk
I believe that if you and your significant other are involved in the salsa dance community you are already doing something amazing for your relationship.
Being able to go out and actually dance with each other in an amazing way is really what most people want in their relationship. If this sounds like you , then you are already ahead of the game.
True, the down side to being involved in the dance community is that you may need to share your significant other with other dancers, and at the end of the day it may bring some risks with it.
But I truly feel that the benefits way out weigh the risks.
Final thoughts
Its great to be able to do something with your significant other that continues to grow and you get to grow together. Everyone around you is envious when they see you on the floor.
Dancing salsa is a great way to meet other people and share in the community of salsa dancers. You will never be that couple that just stands around drinking their cocktails and tapping your foot on the floor to the music.
You will be that couple that is out on the floor dancing away to the music while everyone looks on amazed at the connection that you have between each other. They will all want to talk to you and ask how you as a couple learned that amazing dance.
No matter where you go, you as a couple will always be able to show your skills as long as there is music playing. To me, that is so worth the risk of having to share my significant other once in awhile on the dance floor.
And lets be realistic, trying to throw a bunch of rules into your relationship in the context of dancing will just stir up many problems. Sometimes you just have to accept the things that you cannot control and indulge in the things that you can.
I think the most important thing is to be compassionate to each others feelings and perhaps some insecurities. We all have our weaknesses.
Salsa dancing should be a strength that you as a couple have to share and celebrate. Everything comes with its down sides, just work around them and keep on dancing!